Never gone be the same

I just woke up tonight
Surrounded by smelly garbage
I looked left and right
Yet didn't catch....
The reason I'm thrown in the ally


I tried to stand on feet
But something inside really hurt
I held into the wooden walls
Working on my shaky legs


I started to move
The pain getting worse
I walked out to the crowdie street
Rubbing my eyes
As some lights went through


Then that little girl
Pointed her fingers on me
Telling her mother
To take a look at me


That woman stared widely
Her face turned pale
Staring somewhere behind me


I tried to find out
What's wrong???
Was I a ghost?
Or was I just smelly and dirty


I stared back at her
As other people near
Turned towards me
With pitiful gazes
And apologetic stares


Cops approaching me
Carefully and slowly
I really didn't get it
I asked out loud...
"Do you know me?"
Some old women
Started to cry


I felt something was really wrong
I breathed in some air
Looked down at my new pinky dress
It was full of blood
I looked to my hand
It held a sharp knife
I then looked behind


Dead man was ahead
I closed my eyes
And remembered it all


I killed a man
Who just chose me
And raped me hard
'cause it felt…
Somehow fun back then


I couldn't stop myself
From taking out
All that rage
Stubbing him
Multiple times


It felt so right
Digging that knife
Inside his throat
I just couldn't control it
That thirsty feeling
Of getting even


I did what I had to do
Didn't regret it
As the cops
Held me down


It was obvious
I'll be out
As soon as the story
Of the hideous incident
Was reviled


But still....
Something wrong felt inside
'cause I knew
I'm never...


Gone be the same....